


Your Name

by Kedavranox



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, Emotional Hurt, M/M, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-19
Updated: 2013-04-19
Packaged: 2017-12-08 21:47:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 532
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/766396
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kedavranox/pseuds/Kedavranox
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>I try not to say your name at all.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Your Name

**Author's Note:**

> So, [](http://melusinahp.livejournal.com/profile)[**melusinahp**](http://melusinahp.livejournal.com/) 's challenge turned out to be a great success! Read all the fabulous drabbles over on her journal [here](http://melusinahp.livejournal.com/1045942.html) and [here.](http://melusinahp.livejournal.com/1045580.html)
> 
> Here is the drabble I wrote :)
> 
> I hope we do something like this again soon! :)
> 
> **The Prompt** _“To burn with desire and keep quiet about it is the greatest punishment we can bring on ourselves.”― Federico García Lorca, Blood Wedding and Yerma._

**Title:** Your Name  
 **Rating:** R  
 **Pairing:** You figure it out :P  
 **Warnings:** Angst!  
 **Disclaimer:** These characters belong to J.K. Rowling and rights-holders, one of whom I am not.

 

When you brought him over to our flat, I broke a glass in my fist.

I still have the scars. I wouldn’t let you heal them, even though you told me I was an idiot and I should trust you with a wand by now. Your hands were shaking and I couldn’t believe you were fussing over such a stupid little thing.

Maybe you were shaking because I hadn’t said a word since you came home with him. Maybe you wanted me to smile and say it was okay. You brought a Malfoy into our lives, and I was supposed to be _okay_ with that.

You held my hand under the sink and wrapped my palm in a cloth and when you went back to him, I felt a splinter in my heart.

You let him touch you. I’ve been trying to touch you since we were eleven and you sat in my carriage and you looked at me as if I held the moon in my hands.

You save that look just for him, these days.

I fucked Zabini once to see if maybe it was a Slytherin thing. He rode my cock and called me Weasley and I pretended it was you. I might have said your name when I came, I don’t really remember. He didn’t say anything about it, so maybe I didn’t.

It doesn’t matter.

I wanted to.

I always knew you were fucking Malfoy. You’d come home in the mornings with love bites on your neck and a stupid, shit-eating grin on your face. You stopped smoking. You smiled more. I didn’t have to look in on you in the night when I woke to take a piss, because you didn’t dream as loudly as you used to. The few nights you were home, anyway.

When you brought him over for Sunday lunch and told my mum you loved him, I sicked up in the bathroom while everyone made a toast. I gripped the white porcelain with my fingers and heaved everything all at once. It wasn’t you who came to check on me, but him, and oh, that burned. He called me by my first name. He held out a flask of one of his stupid potions and looked down on me as if he had the nerve to pity me. The fucking prick.

When you came to my flat that night, I almost didn’t let you in because I didn’t want to see that same look in your eyes. Pity. But then you showed me the ring, and I knew I it was over.

When you married him, I cried in Hermione’s hair and she looked up and smiled at me. She probably thought I was happy for you.

I wasn’t.

You married him and she married a Muggle, and I still fuck blokes with black hair and green eyes and scars and baggage and bad eyesight.

I never say your name anymore when I come.

I try not to say your name at all.


End file.
